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Hogarth rolled out of bed, trying no to wake the waitress.
It had been a night filled with shameful, sticky moments, and he’d rather just leave without having to account for his actions.
As he sat in his car, trying to decide where to search next for his missing twin brother Randall, he thought back about the days of being a boy detective.
He and his friends Boy Martian and Monster girl made up the Specific detective team, and they were quite popular.
They traveled around the world using their intellects to solve crime, and even started the Boy Detectives League. His brother, Randall, wasn’t so keen on detecting, so it happened to be quite serendipitous when he was offered the chance to play his own brother in the television series about Hogarth’s adventures.
This job went on for several years, and continued on after that through conventions and public appearances. When he was old enough to appreciate it, Randall began to take advantage of the benefits that came with being a former child star. 
There was always some housewife, schoolteacher of waitress that remembered watching the show, assumed that he really was Hogarth, and took him to bed.
As a matter of fact, Randall got more tail pretending to be Hogarth than Hogarth got by actually being himself.
But Randall was missing now. No one had seen him in weeks, no one except for the waitress.
Hogarth pulled into traffic and head towards the highway without ever knowing that the Waitress was pregnant with his missing brothers child- a child that was, in many ways, the answer to all his questions.
Hogarth also failed to realize that he was going to die soon. He and Randall, and even Monster Girls and Boy Martian.
If only he’d waited for the Waitress to awaken.
Stepping out of the function of narrator for a second, I have to say that eventually things will all work out. Oh sure, all those people are still going to die, but there will be a happy ending.
You’ll see…