Those damn kids

"Ehg? What did you say youngster?" The old man asked as he rocked
slowly on the front porch.

"We wanted to know about the vampires," One of several young boys
called up to the porch.

"No vampires. No werewolves. No mummies. No nuttin," He said with a
wave of his hand.

"What about the rumors?"

"No rumors, just facts."

"What are the facts old man?" another boy called out.

So swift the boys didn't see it, the old man lashed out with his
cane, and popped the boy across the leg. The boy cried out in pain.
"The facts are that I will kick all your asses if you aren't careful."