Friday, November 30, 2007


The Moonbooted bum and the Alien sat atop the Scepter Building on a cold, cold, cold night.

"These shoes won’t work for you. They only work for me," the Moonbooted bum said.

"Well, you’re not exactly a fuckin’ fashion plate yourself," the Alien replied.

Moonboots stood up onto the ledge.

"I ain’t talkin’ fashion, ya’ Goddamned green-skinned bastard! On my planet, you need these boots to get around."

"I’ve been getting’ around just fine without your stupid boots, pal. Siddown! You’re gonna’ fall off this fucker if you don’t be careful!"

Moonboots let out a "Bah" as he walked tight-roped on the edge, away from the Alien.

"You don’t even know what the fuck I’m talkin’ about, spaceman," Moonboots said. "I’m talkin’ ‘bout anti-gravity here. I could walk offa’ this skyscraper and walk right over to that lady’s window, knock on it and borrow a cuppa’ sugar in these boots if I wanted to. That’s the power I have on this planet, you hear me?"

"Why don’t you do it then?"

Moonboots stopped in his tracks and turned back to the Alien.

"What did you say to me?" Moonboots asked.

"You heard me. Prove it!"

Moonboots bumbly ambled over to the Alien.

"You prove it!" Moonboots screamed as he pushed the Alien off the roof. The Alien hollered all the way down and hit the pavement with a sickening thud.

"Christ, I hate aliens," Moonboots whispered, taking off his boots. He sat on the ledge again and smelled the insides of the boots as car horns blared on the street below. 



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