Friday, April 4, 2008

THE RETURN OF COREY HART

We’re leaving you pock-marked, as was our agreement.  You’ll be left in a vacant field next to the water treatment plant.  Apart from your syringe device, you’ll be given the shades and a six-pack.  You must drink them all before you continue.  We’ve replaced the Red Stripes with something we like to call God-Brau.  It should take effect by the third, though depending on your metabolism, God-Brau could give you the strength of 20 or reduce you to a feeble, brain-dead mongoloid in that field.  Our hope is that it will leave you with the former rather than the latter.  Once you’re done drinking, put the shades on and hit the plant.  The inner workings of the shades are outfitted with a tracking system.  When you’re in the main room, the sprinkler system should kick in.  At that point, inject the syringe into each of your pock-marks.  If you remain conscious, dive into pool 7-L.  We’ll see you on the other side.




-SLL

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